It was such a bitter sweet day and I suppose will always be. I was so excited (in a sappy, "oh my babies are getting so big and will graduate high school next year if we keep at this rate" kind of way) for my babies to have overcome all adversity to make it to their first birthday...3 months premature, one on the vent for a month, heart surgery at 3 weeks of life, a 3 month NICU stay, oxygen until 6 months, Hisrchprungs Disease....and the list goes on! In the same breath, it is just a sad day. Looking back one year ago, I was being wheeled back to deliver my quadruplets...not three....FOUR! My heart just yearned for my sweet Brock to be here to celebrate his momentous birth with us and his brothers. He fought the same fight they did and came home to grow up with his brothers; but wasn't given the chance. I constantly remind myself that if not for Brock, then my Grayson might not be here too; so in that aspect I try to not be any kind of bitter to the situation...but I still struggle with that battle. We played "If I Die Young" at my baby's funeral and I turn the TV to pop hits while they eat each meal...and it seems as if that song has played everyday, sometimes multiple times....I can't help but to find myself tearing up. It is not a bad thing...just another reminder of my precious angel!
After the boys' sacred morning nap, we packed up to head to Panama City to bring Brock his Birthday gift and to wish him a Happy Birthday and to also take the boys out to an epic first birthday dinner with Nana and Auntie Ilea and Ella. Well....we started out the trip all wrong and should have seen this as an omen for the day!!!!! We took the "scenic" route on a Wednesday morning that was obviously the vacantioner's dream day to come to Destin! We were in the car for what seemed for forever!!!!!!! Once we got home, we took the boys to Nana's work to show then off (she is so proud) and to feed them a snack...needless to say...we took over City Hall!!!!!! Once bellies were full and they had been passed to all of the excited ladies...we went to see Brock. We got him a "Cars" car, four carnation flowers, and a 1 cupcake sign for the ground. I can not begin to describe the emotions I had when singing "Happy Birthday to You, Happy Birthday to You, Happy First Birthday Momma's Sweet Brock....Happy Birthday to You". That being said, how thankful I am to have the opportunity to go and see my baby on his birthday and that we are not hours apart anymore!
After seeing Brock, we loaded up to head to Pier Park where we intended on having the boys' dinner at Margaritaville. Who would have thought that at 4 pm on a Wednesday afternoon....there would be an hour wait!!!!! My boys' have sat in the car all day as it was, sitting for another hour....they would be done for!!!!!! As bummed as Jeff and I were, we sucked it up and took them to TJIFridays. Fun they had all of the same!!!! ( note to all....they do not sing Happy Birthday; which is all we wanted for our boys....we sang it to them though which is good enough!)!
For their official first birthday party we had Jeff's sister, her husband, their two kids and his mom here to visit! We were doing the Seuss Party theme but this time it would be at the private Hurlbert Beach and Pavilion which would have been perfect!....but it was far from it!!!! From getting balloons, to decorating in what seemed like huricane force winds, to Keaton's name missing on the cake....it just all went completely wrong! Once our sweet guests arrived...it monsooned! We ripped the boys' clothes off, Jeff cut the cake for the guests...and the boys dug into theirs! We had everything to grill burgers and got dogs....but the grill wouldnt stay lit with the horrible conditions! On the positive side...we will NEVER forget their first birthday party!!!!!!!From the pictures my sweet sister in law and neighbor (who is a triplet mom to beautiful 4 year old boys) took; you would never know it was a disasterous day! Although we were not able to release the dozen ballons we worked so hard to get for Sweet Brock...I know he was there with us celebrating the momentous day! And even though I do not have all four of my boys here, I know I have one amazing angel....I am blessed times four!